Ok, you know, I kept meaning to say this, but never found the rig…
Ok, you know, I kept meaning to say this, but never found the right time, but after hearing this whopper, I’m… I just can’t live like this anymore.
…
I destroyed the rainforests. Ok? I did it. Me. I’m the cause of it. I’m sorry I destroyed all of them. I didn’t realize they were needed for stuff.
You asked me to apologize and that’s just what I did.
I also made the Earth warmer, melted the ice caps, made the Earth closer to an Ice Age, caused smog, increased carbon dioxide in the air, increased carbon monoxide in the air and um… I’m sorry about those too. I was just on a roll.
I’m sorry, and I won’t do it again.
…
Now can we pretty please stop the war on drugs, the war on terror and the debate about global climate change, so we can focus on what really matters?